As KID-TV visits Santa Claus' famous North Pole toy workshop, the program is watched in wonder by two sad-eyed Martian children. Their father is worried, so he leads on expeditionary force to earth. Their mission: to kidnap Father Christmas and take him back to Mars. Their first earth contacts are brother and sister Billy and Betty Foster, who not only help the Martians find the North Pole, but also make the return journey to Mans with Sanka on board. For the moment it seems, the Martians have conquered Santa Claus. But the tables are about to be turned... Regarded as one of the most memorable "cult films" of all time, Santa Claus Conquers The Martians is an imaginatively "trippy" and delightful low-budget holiday fantasy.

A teenager named Kurrat mysteriously disappears from a German boys' school. Then a teacher is found dead; the mystery grows.

In a series of vignettes, a pathetic man is abused by a bitter prostitute, a sculptor and her model try to suppress their longings for each other, and a lonely middle-aged man is caught by his wife in bed with another woman.

A monstrous and evil brain from outer space leads his minions on a crusade to conquer the entirety of the universe, unleashing hideous monsters on Earth that spread deadly diseases.

A star-studded cavalcade of burlesque. Clowning! Dancing! Teasing! 15 all time greats of the burlesque stage.

From Something Weird Video: During the Great White Suburban Drug Scare of the late sixties / early seventies, parents, educators, and corporate sponsors banded together in an effort to scare American teens away from getting high. It might be argued that the weird and often hysterical propoganda films that emerged from this era created more drug abuse than they prevented. Nevertheless, here’s a handful of Classroom Scare Films from a groovy by-gone era that will fascinate and entertain you from beginning to end... Featuring Featuring Weed, Ups / Downs, and more.

POLLY POCKETS, an un-aired pilot for a 1960’s kiddie TV show that has absolutely nothing to do with the tiny plastic dolls, and is best viewed under the influence of a mind-altering substance. It features a cheerfully toothy brunette who wears a gaudy patchwork skirt with magical pockets filled with all sorts of goodies. She is accompanied by Dandy Andy, a middle-aged man dressed like Abe Lincoln. After gliding upon a magical trunk, they reach a world of whimsy, complete with kooky contraptions, calliope music, rope tricks, and stories which are told with hand-drawn cartoon illustrations. (Apparently, there was no budget for actual animation.) When Polly pulls an onion out of her pocket, she’s reminded of an adventure at the Castle of Gloom, where character actor Percy Helton is a henchman, and she’s arrested for being happy and sent to the onion dungeon.

Shrewd, conniving goddess Stacey Kane (MEG MYLES) is a second-rate stripper in a third-rate carnival. Startled when she finds her junkie ex-husband lurking in her dressing room, Stacey promptly steals every cent he has and hops on a plane for New York. Great, gritty exploitation which packed a hell of a wallop in the more innocent days of 1962.

Musician Richard Carlson is haunted by a ghostly girlfriend in director Bert I. Gordon's 72-Minute feature length Chiller-Diller from 1960.

A gang of teenage criminals vandalize a small community by stealing cars for parts, meanwhile an investigator is hot on their trail.

Not a lot is known about this exploitation clip-collage which examines the classic marijuana scare-films of the 1920s through the 1940s. However, the year of release, tone of the narration, and the complete lack of credits indicate that The Devil's Joint may well have been some kind of underground film. After all, it was released around the time when vintage drug films like the 1936 Reefer Madness were being rediscovered by a new generation via midnight screenings at smoke-filled theaters and college universities. The tone here is cleverly set from the opening text which informs us that the film has been made without the cooperation of the Whit House, FBI, or local police authorities. In case you still didn't get the hint, The Devil's Joint then shows us a clip of TICHARD NIXON stating that he is here to tell us the truth despite his honesty and integrity being under question, before cutting to grisly newsreel footage of Chinese opium users being executed in the 1930s. What follow is essentially a series of extended clips from a number of the most notorious roadeshow drugsploitation films including Reefer Madness (of course), as well as a silent film from the 1920s called The Pace That Kills For the most part, the film wisely lets these clips speak for themselves, although a narrator does give us a quick rundown of all the propaganda clichés used in the drug scare genre, and during sequences which depict stoned people fighting, Batman-style "Pows!" and "Zaps!" flash across the screen. Occasionally, silent-movie-style text cards pop up displaying lurid pulp blurbs like "An Innocent young virgin under the spell of the Killer Weed! Will she fall prey to man's lust?"

A woman's job as a sex researcher takes her all over the world and gets her into some difficult situations.

Hercules is summoned to oppose the evil Queen Samara, who has allied herself with aliens and is sacrificing her own people in a bid to awaken a moon goddess.

Tough college student Tod Palmer (Robert Sherman) patiently suffers increasingly severe hazing at the hands of sadistic Ky Walker (Russell Johnson) while pledging a fraternity at Wake College. Attempting to bring the ritual initiation abuses to the authorities' attention, Tod accidentally dies after fleeing from the angry fraternity brothers. Medical professor Dr. Stephen Brice (Paul Henreid) then tries to end the practice of hazing, determined to obtain justice for one of his best students.

“The Film That’s Scorchin’ The Nation’s Screens!” The She who Shoulda Said ‘No’! is honeypot LILA LEEDS (Lady in the Lake, Moonrise) who was busted for doing doobies with rugged Robert Mitchum just months before this updated upgrade of Reefer Madness. Cashing in on the notoriety of “The Screen’s Newest Blonde Bomb,” KROGER BABB, “America’s Fearless Showman,” promoted the film as “The Story of Lila Leeds and Her Expose of the Marijuana Racket!” (She’s even costumed in the same suit she wore when she was sentenced with Mitchum!)

Benevolent aliens from the planet Emerald send superhero Starman to protect Earth from invasion by an evil alien race called the Spherions.

Here’s an odd but nonetheless fascinating time capsule of late- Sixties social unrest filtered through the mind of Florida-based sexploitation producer-director HARRY KERWIN. Yup, the man who made Strange Rampage, My Third Wife George, and Girls Come Too - and who was also the brother of Blood Feast star Bill Kerwin ­ wanted to tap into the same youth market companies Like AlP were so good at exploiting. But lacking the funds to make something along the lines of an Easy Rider or a Wild in the Streets, Kerwin blissfully dispensed with both fiction and actors and, instead, went out and filmed The Real Thing. Combining (rough, raw) authentic footage of bikers, peace protestors, and the crowd at a rock festival, he created the mondoesque It’s a Revolution Mother! a self-described "Documentary of Love" tied together with an exuberant (and often hilarious) anti-government-anti­ establishment-anti-Vietnam-war-pro-rebellion rant -written by TOM CASEY, director of Sometimes Aunt Martha Does Dreadful Things (’71) - delivered by an uncredited narrator who sounds like an AM disk jockey on speed.

Ring in the holidays with nostalgic Christmas-themed theatre intermissions, weird cartoons, creepy stop-motion animation, and, brace yourself, Liberace! These hand-picked classics from Something Weird Video are sure to delight, disturb and put you in the spirit of the season.

A mondo type exploitation "documentary" about debauched practices of modern Man.

To celebrate 20 years of Something Weird bringing the world the very best in subversive, disreputable, and cult cinema, SWV made available four exceedingly rare, never-before-released jewels that will make any cinephile’s head light up and spin. Rosie (b&w) is a failed 19-minute pilot for a TV sitcom about a talking dog named Rosie. It is absolutely horrifying. Why? Because the dog is not played by a real canine (or a puppet or a cartoon) but by a large adult in a mangy dog suit with a creepy dog face, clumsily walking around on his hands and knees. The Weird World of Weird (1970, color) is a loony 47-minute never-aired TV special in which host RALPH STORY explores psychic phenomena, astrology, witchcraft and “all those mysterious secrets hidden in the mystical world of the occult.” with detours to a psychic “balloon reader” and a spook-filled séance at the Magic Castle. It's got a groovy, late-60s psychedelic feel to it all that makes it a wonderfully bizarre time capsule. Follow That Skirt (1964, color) is a nasty little 26-minute short that was probably intended to be America’s second gore film. Though not released until 1965 when, according to Dave Friedman, it played a single theater in San Francisco, there’s little doubt that Blood Feast was its influence. Based on the popularity of its trailer, The Smut Peddler (1965, b&w) is among a handful of currently “lost” films that Something Weird (as well as the rest of the world) has been actively searching for. So we were thrilled when we at least found this much in excellent condition. And, yeah, it’s good stuff. A crude oyster-eating publisher, a lesbian secretary, and a French photographer all love mauling and exploiting their lovely nude models while W.B. PARKER (Olga’s House of Shame) is shocked and appalled. - Frank Henenlotter